at the end
at the end of these long roads
we will gather
with our hands in the air


I need to be writing up pages of stuff for this consulting project and pulling together my power point. This class will be over in <1.5 weeks, for better or worse. I want to just throw it together but at the same time feel guilty because this is a real life small business that we are trying to save.

I am graduating with my MBA in a couple weeks. Is this a joke? I guess not. I've spent like $30,000 and 3.5 years on it. Well, my company has paid for 45% and will pay up to 90% of it if I stick around long enough. I feel uncomfortable. Silly. Out of all there is to learn about in the world...an MBA??? I don't feel like I've learned much and am not interested in business. Weird.

Looking back, I enjoyed researching and writing some of the papers that I did. My paper for my intro to legal & ethical business practices class, I thought, was poignant, well-researched, and top-notch (covering the Illegal Immigration divide. Maybe I'll post it here). I enjoyed researching my Global Business Environment paper, too, about the future of American economic dominance.

Last May I spent two weeks in Spain taking a European Union Business Strategy course, which. was. awesome. A great time living in community like I was an undergrad again with 20 young MBA'ers from Loyola and SLU. I got to see all of the art and monuments and people and food and culture that I had learned of in my Spanish civilization capstone class in undergrad. I got to see in the flesh Goya's paintings that had given me goosebumps when I poured over their grainy copies in my textbook. I love Spain so much. It is such an amazing country- so diverse, separated into these distinct cultural regions with such rich history (also, a historical example of where Muslims, Jews, and Christians lived in peace for centuries). I yearn to live over there for a year or two.

Marketing was one class I was dreading because of its endless promoting of consumerism and stuff. It turned out to be one of the best classes I took! Instead of a dry textbook we studied some of the best print advertising in the industry. Through the book "Hey Whipple, Squeeze This!" and creating our own advertising campaign, I loved living the depths of victory and despair that come with creative ideas. I fell in love with the challenge of combining vivid visuals with strong copy. We spent the last 15 minutes of each class watching... commercials! Some of the marketing for justice and social issues was so incredible. :Goosebumps: Plus, there were searching discussions facilitated by our fantastic professor about the real ethical questions of marketing. Thank God for some critical thinking!

My derivatives class was very challenging. Even in the thick of it, I was only really understanding the large concepts. But you know what? Large concepts are what you remember for the rest of your life experience. (I am NOT saying that having some vague concepts are enough to go around creating and trading financial instruments, fyi!) Most of my financial and statistics classes were so concentrated in getting the right answer to these specific quantitative problems that I have no idea what the big picture idea was. This is the travesty of our multiple choice, emphasis on regurgitation for the test educational system. People get A's but have not learned a darned thing. We just cultivate a culture of "educated" ignorance.

My derivatives teacher, Tom Miller, is a genius. If only these Wall Street executives had taken a derivatives class! (ha, no really..) Derivatives allow you to hedge against any liabilities and uncertainties and should lead to a more stable economy if used responsibly. Unfortunately our government has gotten out of the business of regulation. If our government has stripped away all of its regulatory authority and is too weak and ignorant to control or understand what these companies are up to, market externalities will destroy us. They have and they will again if we don't take them seriously. Remember the 1980s savings & loan crisis? It happened again (except hundreds of times worse) because financial regulation was not tightened. How many disasters will it take? We need protection by something that cannot be bought off! Alas, I'm afraid our government has assumed a position of enabler and cronie.

Anyway, yes, derivatives are complex. Most of the problems in the world are. As Adam said yesterday, if it isn't understandable in a 10 second newsbite, America doesn't care and writes it off. I am scared of big business. Republican big interests have sold disgusting fear-mongoring tactics... and America has eaten it up in a *very* scary way.

I will not get into my fears for a country that gives any weight to anything Sarah Palin or Glenn Beck utters.

Finally, I took one class outside of the business school in the school of Public Policy! MAN, do I love those liberal arts classes, professors, and students. Talk about critical thinking! Do you think if we were better informed on how America works, maybe we would be better citizens, voters, and activists? Nah, who wants an informed populace? They are so hard to please, harder to fool, won't fall for propaganda as easily...

I had some real big flops where I learned nothing and felt cheated out of money and time... Operations Management. Nuff said.

I guess in writing this out, I have learned more than I thought. I am grateful for that. I am always thankful for an excuse to research, write, and inform. I would have loved to do a final project researching the merits of microfinancing in reducing world poverty rather than consulting for this small business. But education is ongoing. Travel, books, well-researched news (npr.org folks), documentaries, and just an awareness of the world go so far.

As I finish up this graduate degree (now feeling a little more proud and grateful after taking the time to write it out), I hope to continue in pursuit and advocacy of meaningful education. School's out, the world awaits!

As Missourian Mark Twain says, "I have never let schooling interfere with my education."

Amen.