Sometimes at work, I die of boredom.

I end up doing very weird things like jumping jacks in the bathroom stalls or creating facebook profiles for inflatable friends (add Sharkie McSharkerson as your friend!) or trying to hold in my laughter until I sound like a dying horse when I look at old pictures (especially of dear Corky Keating). Or I go into ultra-organizing-my-life-and-others' mode where I used to search for apartments in Boston for Matt creating intricate excel spreadsheets of characteristics and plotting them on maps to know how close they would be to the T or bus stop. Or creating budgeting plans for myself and my roommate complete with pie charts and year-to-date totals. Or I begin planning my life years in advance... I make memos to myself of what annoys me about weddings that I definitely do NOT want to be in mine, list characteristics of houses I like, fill out a mortgage calculator to find out what kind of house I can afford, list reminders of things I want my future family to do/be like, compile ways to organize your home office, or helpful hints in planning a dinner or cocktail party. I investigate toxic shock syndrome and nuclear energy on wikipedia, have fallen in love with thenest.com, read nearly every article on organization on Real Simple magazine's website, and shopped for multiple friends' weddings thanks to theknot.com. I won't even mention my intense facebook stalking... I'm creepy.

Maybe it's time to ask my boss for more work.

But it's just a cycle. A monthly cycle. Because then some weeks I work 12 hour days and occassionally forget to eat or go home. Ahhhh!!!!!!

So.... what can you do? What's up? I just want to help people, but other than trying to give my money away, I'm not exactly on the most efficient track for doing that. Besides, it's too easy and detached to throw money at things-- I desperately want to fix the system. Anywho, I know that people need their company's retirement pension accounts managed, and I'm good at my job (clearly too efficient)... I ponder the meaning of work, the meaning of life, what difference I could make, the many pitfalls of capitalism (and then ponder the irony that my job depends on that shady system). Once again, I look like a quintessential young professional grad student on the outside, but I can't just turn off my concious, sense of responsibility as a global neighbor & sister in Christ... I don't want to be just another ignorant American producer and consumer in the system.

I took a quiz via facebook today that said I tied between being an engineering and art major. What?! I am intensely left and right brained, easy-going yet a detailed perfectionist, creative and bohemian yet systematic and thought-out, love pondering the ideal world of the big and small picture... blah, so? So? So what good are these gifts??? How can I change the world with this? Meh!!!! ::frustration::

Woohoo! Collateral summary is ready! That will provide me with about 5 minutes of work... maybe I will encounter a problem and it will take me a whole 30 minutes to solve it! Oooooh!